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Charles Dickens >> The Pickwick Papers (page 103)


Job Trotter, abating nothing of his speed, ran up Holborn,sometimes in the middle of the road, sometimes on thepavement, sometimes in the gutter, as the chances of getting alongvaried with the press of men, women, children, and coaches, ineach division of the thoroughfare, and, regardless of all obstaclesstopped not for an instant until he reached the gate of Gray'sInn. Notwithstanding all the expedition he had used, however,the gate had been closed a good half-hour when he reached it, andby the time he had discovered Mr. Perker's laundress, who livedwith a married daughter, who had bestowed her hand upon anon-resident waiter, who occupied the one-pair of some numberin some street closely adjoining to some brewery somewherebehind Gray's Inn Lane, it was within fifteen minutes of closingthe prison for the night. Mr. Lowten had still to be ferreted outfrom the back parlour of the Magpie and Stump; and Job hadscarcely accomplished this object, and communicated SamWeller's message, when the clock struck ten.

'There,' said Lowten, 'it's too late now. You can't get into-night; you've got the key of the street, my friend.'

'Never mind me,' replied Job. 'I can sleep anywhere. But won'tit be better to see Mr. Perker to-night, so that we may be there,the first thing in the morning?'

'Why,' responded Lowten, after a little consideration, 'if it wasin anybody else's case, Perker wouldn't be best pleased at mygoing up to his house; but as it's Mr. Pickwick's, I think I mayventure to take a cab and charge it to the office.' Deciding on thisline of conduct, Mr. Lowten took up his hat, and begging theassembled company to appoint a deputy-chairman during histemporary absence, led the way to the nearest coach-stand.Summoning the cab of most promising appearance, he directedthe driver to repair to Montague Place, Russell Square.

Mr. Perker had had a dinner-party that day, as was testifiedby the appearance of lights in the drawing-room windows, thesound of an improved grand piano, and an improvable cabinetvoice issuing therefrom, and a rather overpowering smell of meatwhich pervaded the steps and entry. In fact, a couple of very goodcountry agencies happening to come up to town, at the sametime, an agreeable little party had been got together to meet them,comprising Mr. Snicks, the Life Office Secretary, Mr. Prosee, theeminent counsel, three solicitors, one commissioner of bankrupts,a special pleader from the Temple, a small-eyed peremptoryyoung gentleman, his pupil, who had written a lively book aboutthe law of demises, with a vast quantity of marginal notes andreferences; and several other eminent and distinguished personages.From this society, little Mr. Perker detached himself, on hisclerk being announced in a whisper; and repairing to the dining-room, there found Mr. Lowten and Job Trotter looking very dimand shadowy by the light of a kitchen candle, which the gentlemanwho condescended to appear in plush shorts and cottonsfor a quarterly stipend, had, with a becoming contempt for theclerk and all things appertaining to 'the office,' placed upon the table.

'Now, Lowten,' said little Mr. Perker, shutting the door,'what'sthe matter? No important letter come in a parcel, is there?'

'No, Sir,' replied Lowten. 'This is a messenger from Mr.Pickwick, Sir.'

'From Pickwick, eh?' said the little man, turning quickly toJob. 'Well, what is it?'

'Dodson and Fogg have taken Mrs. Bardell in execution forher costs, Sir,' said Job.

'No!' exclaimed Perker, putting his hands in his pockets, andreclining against the sideboard.

'Yes,' said Job. 'It seems they got a cognovit out of her, for theamount of 'em, directly after the trial.'

'By Jove!' said Perker, taking both hands out of his pockets,and striking the knuckles of his right against the palm of his left,emphatically, 'those are the cleverest scamps I ever had anythingto do with!'

'The sharpest practitioners I ever knew, Sir,' observed Lowten.

'Sharp!' echoed Perker. 'There's no knowing where to have them.'

'Very true, Sir, there is not,' replied Lowten; and then, bothmaster and man pondered for a few seconds, with animatedcountenances, as if they were reflecting upon one of the mostbeautiful and ingenious discoveries that the intellect of man hadever made. When they had in some measure recovered from theirtrance of admiration, Job Trotter discharged himself of the restof his commission. Perker nodded his head thoughtfully, andpulled out his watch.

'At ten precisely, I will be there,' said the little man. 'Sam isquite right. Tell him so. Will you take a glass of wine, Lowten?''No, thank you, Sir.'

'You mean yes, I think,' said the little man, turning to thesideboard for a decanter and glasses.

As Lowten DID mean yes, he said no more on the subject, butinquired of Job, in an audible whisper, whether the portrait ofPerker, which hung opposite the fireplace, wasn't a wonderfullikeness, to which Job of course replied that it was. The winebeing by this time poured out, Lowten drank to Mrs. Perker andthe children, and Job to Perker. The gentleman in the plushshorts and cottons considering it no part of his duty to show thepeople from the office out, consistently declined to answer thebell, and they showed themselves out. The attorney betook himselfto his drawing-room, the clerk to the Magpie and Stump, andJob to Covent Garden Market to spend the night in a vegetable basket.

Punctually at the appointed hour next morning, the good-humoured little attorney tapped at Mr. Pickwick's door, whichwas opened with great alacrity by Sam Weller.

'Mr. Perker, sir,' said Sam, announcing the visitor to Mr.Pickwick, who was sitting at the window in a thoughtful attitude.'Wery glad you've looked in accidentally, Sir. I rather think thegov'nor wants to have a word and a half with you, Sir.'

Perker bestowed a look of intelligence on Sam, intimating thathe understood he was not to say he had been sent for; andbeckoning him to approach, whispered briefly in his ear.

'You don't mean that 'ere, Sir?' said Sam, starting back inexcessive surprise.

Perker nodded and smiled.

Mr. Samuel Weller looked at the little lawyer, then at Mr.Pickwick, then at the ceiling, then at Perker again; grinned,laughed outright, and finally, catching up his hat from the carpet,without further explanation, disappeared.

'What does this mean?' inquired Mr. Pickwick, looking atPerker with astonishment. 'What has put Sam into thisextraordinary state?'

'Oh, nothing, nothing,' replied Perker. 'Come, my dear Sir,draw up your chair to the table. I have a good deal to say to you.'

'What papers are those?' inquired Mr. Pickwick, as the littleman deposited on the table a small bundle of documents tied withred tape.

'The papers in Bardell and Pickwick,' replied Perker, undoingthe knot with his teeth.

Mr. Pickwick grated the legs of his chair against the ground;and throwing himself into it, folded his hands and looked sternly--if Mr. Pickwick ever could look sternly--at his legal friend.

'You don't like to hear the name of the cause?' said the littleman, still busying himself with the knot.

'No, I do not indeed,' replied Mr. Pickwick.

'Sorry for that,' resumed Perker, 'because it will form thesubject of our conversation.'

'I would rather that the subject should be never mentionedbetween us, Perker,' interposed Mr. Pickwick hastily.

'Pooh, pooh, my dear Sir,' said the little man, untying thebundle, and glancing eagerly at Mr. Pickwick out of the cornersof his eyes. 'It must be mentioned. I have come here on purpose.Now, are you ready to hear what I have to say, my dear Sir? Nohurry; if you are not, I can wait. I have this morning's paperhere. Your time shall be mine. There!' Hereupon, the little manthrew one leg over the other, and made a show of beginning toread with great composure and application.

'Well, well,' said Mr. Pickwick, with a sigh, but softening intoa smile at the same time. 'Say what you have to say; it's the oldstory, I suppose?'

'With a difference, my dear Sir; with a difference,' rejoinedPerker, deliberately folding up the paper and putting it into hispocket again. 'Mrs. Bardell, the plaintiff in the action, is withinthese walls, Sir.'

'I know it,' was Mr. Pickwick's reply,

'Very good,' retorted Perker. 'And you know how she comeshere, I suppose; I mean on what grounds, and at whose suit?'

'Yes; at least I have heard Sam's account of the matter,' saidMr. Pickwick, with affected carelessness.

'Sam's account of the matter,' replied Perker, 'is, I will ventureto say, a perfectly correct one. Well now, my dear Sir, the firstquestion I have to ask, is, whether this woman is to remain here?'

'To remain here!' echoed Mr. Pickwick.

'To remain here, my dear Sir,' rejoined Perker, leaning back inhis chair and looking steadily at his client.

'How can you ask me?' said that gentleman. 'It rests withDodson and Fogg; you know that very well.'

'I know nothing of the kind,' retorted Perker firmly. 'It doesNOT rest with Dodson and Fogg; you know the men, my dear Sir,as well as I do. It rests solely, wholly, and entirely with you.'

'With me!' ejaculated Mr. Pickwick, rising nervously from hischair, and reseating himself directly afterwards.

The little man gave a double-knock on the lid of his snuff-box,opened it, took a great pinch, shut it up again, and repeated thewords, 'With you.'

'I say, my dear Sir,' resumed the little man, who seemed togather confidence from the snuff--'I say, that her speedy liberationor perpetual imprisonment rests with you, and with you alone.Hear me out, my dear Sir, if you please, and do not be sovery energetic, for it will only put you into a perspiration and dono good whatever. I say,' continued Perker, checking off eachposition on a different finger, as he laid it down--'I say thatnobody but you can rescue her from this den of wretchedness;and that you can only do that, by paying the costs of this suit--both of plaintive and defendant--into the hands of these FreemanCourt sharks. Now pray be quiet, my dear sir.'

Mr. Pickwick, whose face had been undergoing most surprisingchanges during this speech, and was evidently on the verge of astrong burst of indignation, calmed his wrath as well as he could.Perker, strengthening his argumentative powers with anotherpinch of snuff, proceeded--

'I have seen the woman, this morning. By paying the costs, youcan obtain a full release and discharge from the damages; andfurther--this I know is a far greater object of consideration withyou, my dear sir--a voluntary statement, under her hand, in theform of a letter to me, that this business was, from the very first,fomented, and encouraged, and brought about, by these men,Dodson and Fogg; that she deeply regrets ever having been theinstrument of annoyance or injury to you; and that she entreatsme to intercede with you, and implore your pardon.'

'If I pay her costs for her,' said Mr. Pickwick indignantly. 'Avaluable document, indeed!'

'No "if" in the case, my dear Sir,' said Perker triumphantly.'There is the very letter I speak of. Brought to my office byanother woman at nine o'clock this morning, before I had setfoot in this place, or held any communication with Mrs. Bardell,upon my honour.' Selecting the letter from the bundle, the littlelawyer laid it at Mr. Pickwick's elbow, and took snuff for twoconsecutive minutes, without winking.

'Is this all you have to say to me?' inquired Mr. Pickwick mildly.

'Not quite,' replied Perker. 'I cannot undertake to say, at thismoment, whether the wording of the cognovit, the nature of theostensible consideration, and the proof we can get together aboutthe whole conduct of the suit, will be sufficient to justify anindictment for conspiracy. I fear not, my dear Sir; they are tooclever for that, I doubt. I do mean to say, however, that thewhole facts, taken together, will be sufficient to justify you, in theminds of all reasonable men. And now, my dear Sir, I put it toyou. This one hundred and fifty pounds, or whatever it may be--take it in round numbers--is nothing to you. A jury haddecided against you; well, their verdict is wrong, but still theydecided as they thought right, and it IS against you. You havenow an opportunity, on easy terms, of placing yourself in a muchhigher position than you ever could, by remaining here; whichwould only be imputed, by people who didn't know you, to sheerdogged, wrongheaded, brutal obstinacy; nothing else, my dearSir, believe me. Can you hesitate to avail yourself of it, when itrestores you to your friends, your old pursuits, your health andamusements; when it liberates your faithful and attached servant,whom you otherwise doom to imprisonment for the whole ofyour life; and above all, when it enables you to take the verymagnanimous revenge--which I know, my dear sir, is one afteryour own heart--of releasing this woman from a scene of miseryand debauchery, to which no man should ever be consigned, if Ihad my will, but the infliction of which on any woman, is evenmore frightful and barbarous. Now I ask you, my dear sir, notonly as your legal adviser, but as your very true friend, will youlet slip the occasion of attaining all these objects, and doing allthis good, for the paltry consideration of a few pounds findingtheir way into the pockets of a couple of rascals, to whom itmakes no manner of difference, except that the more they gain,the more they'll seek, and so the sooner be led into some piece ofknavery that must end in a crash? I have put these considerationsto you, my dear Sir, very feebly and imperfectly, but I ask you tothink of them. Turn them over in your mind as long as you please.I wait here most patiently for your answer.'

Title: The Pickwick Papers
Author: Charles Dickens
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